Every year people begin the new year with a resolution mindset. They say “This is the year I lose weight!” or “This is the year I earn $xxxx.”. Every year, it is the same thing. January goes well and then come February, things start to fizzle out.
I had someone ask me the other day if I had decided what my New Year resolutions were going to be yet. I laughed and explained that I refuse to make New Year’s resolutions. I figure that if I can’t make the change needed in June, it won’t magically happen in January.
I have found a more effective way to make changes in my life. I, first, realized that change is a PROCESS not an event. The ball isn’t going to drop us into a new year and we magically have the skill set and tools needed to change. Change happens over a period of time. Sometimes it could take years to make certain changes.
Instead of setting yourself up for failure with resolutions, let’s talk about some ways to set goals and figure out a plan of action to achieve those goals.
You need to take stock of what you want and what you don’t want before you can ever set the first goal. You need to be brutally honest with yourself about your limitations and your desires.
Why is it important to recognize what you don’t want?
You need to face what you don’t want so you can turn it around to what you do want. For example: “I want to get out of debt” is a negative thing because it makes you think about debt. You don’t want debt – however if you think about debt, you will attract even more debt.
It is good to realize that you don’t want debt, but let the goal be “I receive more checks than I do bills” or “I have more than enough money” or ” I have earned $xxxx which provides for all my needs and wants”. If your goal is to be out of debt, why don’t we call it the goal of “Running in the black” using accounting terms. (Black means abundance and red means debt).
Goal: All accounts are in black.
Again, if you want to lose weight, please don’t let your goal be losing weight. If you think about weight, then you will get more weight. If you are passionate about being thinner, why not focus on a goal of good eating and exercising habits? We all know that a side effect of good eating and exercising is a better body.
Goal: Consume 90 Healthy Foods in 30 Days
Goal: Exercise 30 hours in 30 days
When you think about your body, don’t think in terms of weight. Think about how good you look in that pair of jeans. Make that certain size jeans your goal.
Goal: Size 9 Levis Jeans fit wonderfully
Does any of this make sense to you?
I have been guilty of saying I want to lose 100lbs – even recently. I realized that I would never lose that weight if I focused on it. I need to focus on something that excites me and is a positive twist on what I want. I am doing goal blitz for 30 days that mimic what I have written above. I am keeping it simple.
My first goal was to stop drinking Pepsi every day and I have done that. I still have some occasionally but it is not a ruling factor in my life anymore. I have used herbal tea as a replacement and it has been quite satisfying.
Why do you want the things you want?
Boy, this sounds like a weird question. You might wonder why it is important to identify the “why” behind your goals.
This goes back to my belief system on miracles and moving mountains. The scriptures are clear that with the faith the size of a mustard seed, I could move a mountain. So, why haven’t I moved that mountain sitting right down the road from my house? Well, because I don’t see a need to do so. I have no strong beliefs about needing that mountain moved. It is just fine right where it is, so why move it?
The goals we set are our mountains. We need the helping hand of heavenly hosts to helps us achieve some of our goals. Just ask anyone who has ever tried to quit smoking. We have the ability to gain the skill sets, acquire the tools and receive the heavenly help to achieve these goals — and yet, we still fail.
We may ask ourselves why and WHY is our answer.
The “why” is the reason we want to achieve that goal. If it is a person trying to quit smoking, they must have a greater purpose for doing so. Their purpose must be so great that no obstacle will keep them from achieving their goal. Their purpose, their why, must be so clear and so powerful that it fuels them through the hard times.
Why do I want to lose weight?
This question has made me pause. I am not competitive so other peoples looks do not necessarily inspire me to match them. I am a typically happy person so being smaller won’t necessarily bring me more joy. I do miss the power I had when I was 100lbs smaller. I could control the men – but that isn’t important any more because I am happily married and he loves me just fine as I am.
(I am reasoning this out for you – not to share my dirty laundry – but to show you how to break down the layers until the core is found.)
I feel that a strong motivation for me to lose weight is better sex and being able to breath better. I have been asthmatic since Desert Storm and it has gotten worse with weight gain. Also, there are some really cute pant suits I would love to wear but look awful on a person that has a gut. The bottom line for me has to be the sex and breathing. I am more passionate about that than anything else.
I also believe that if I could be in better shape, I could do more athletic things such as Karate. Karate would give me a sense of power back. I do have a controlling side that needs to be fed. Yep, the vision of me kicking some guy’s butt sure does put the fire of passion in my heart to get me going.
What I have just done is figure out my why for losing weight. All of my whys revolve around control and control is my passion. I need to focus on that to ignite my actions when I feel a slump coming on.
As you figure out what you want in life, you need to identify the core “why” so that you can stay motivated through the hard times that will inevitably come. The “why” has to feel passionate. As I was working through my scenario up there, I didn’t feel a burning in my gut until I thought about kicking some guy’s butt. Boy, that lit a fire. That is my motivator. It seems silly, but we will see it work.
I just graduated college after 20 years of taking classes off and on. What was the difference this time? One thing, I found a school that worked with my learning type. Another thing, they provided classes in a form of a list that I could check off.
More importantly, I was passionate about keeping my promise to my mama that I would get my degree. The day I finished my last class, I couldn’t even celebrate because I was crying. I wanted so badly to call my mom and let her know I did it. She has been gone for 20 years now and I know she is watching from heaven. However, it still brings tears to my eyes when I think of her and the promise I made. My promise and my love of my mama was my fuel and motivation to not quit. It created a burning in my gut that saw me through.
Please take the time to figure out your why. I promise from the bottom of my heart that you will be blessed for doing so. You will be empowered from on high.
You Eat an Elephant ONE Bite at a Time
This is common sense but it is amazing how many people get frustrated and quit because they can’t do something immediately. Americans are the worst at expecting immediate gratification – I know because I am an American.
When you figure out what your main goals are in life, you need to take the time and energy to break them up into smaller goals. You can’t expect to go from a size 18 to a size 9 within a month and still be healthy.
If “I want to comfortably wear size 9 Levi jeans by December 25, 2016” is my long term goal, then my medium term goals should reflect increments of this such as “30 days of eating 90 healthy foods”, “30 hours of exercise in 30 days”, “Size 14 Jeans in 60 days”, etc. You get the idea.
Short term goals usually are no longer than a week in length. What could I do in a week? Simple – “7 hours of exercise in 7 days”, “7 days of water only for beverage”, Daily goal of stretching with yoga.
Our short term goals provide an accumulative effect that leads to reaching our medium term goals. Our Medium term goals accumulate into reaching our long term goals.
Basically, we take the time to figure out the bite sized pieces to eat until we consume the whole “elephant” of our goal.
One tool to help with this is Simpleology. Simpleology provides a format for identifying long term goals and instruction/tools on how to break them down into medium and short term goals. It provides a way to stay focused and on task. It is a program I have been using for years with great success. All of my close friends have heard me say “Use it!”. Did I mention it was FREE!!! It even provides easy to use tutorial to help you gain the right mindset in its use. Go check it out — Simpleology
Keep Your Eye on the Ball!
Now that you have your goals identified, take time every day to visualize yourself having already achieved that goal. What does it feel like? Can you identify any smells that you will experience? Can you identify any sounds or feelings? Wrap yourself around the idea that it has already happened.
I used to feel myself wearing a cap and gown and walking across the stage to get my college diploma. I could smell the newness of the gown, hear the clapping of the crowd and feel the perspiration drip down my face as I was in the spot light. Now, I walk in February.
Doing this daily will help get that burning sensation inside your gut fueled and give you more motivation to “Get ‘er Done!”
Accountability is a character quality that a lot of people are missing in this day and age. However, in order to achieve the more stringent goals, accountability is a must. It is necessary that you have a “come to Jesus meetin’ ” with yourself to find out if you are keeping with the daily activities needed to reach your goals. This means you have to be honest with yourself – offering no excuses.
If I didn’t eat 3 healthy foods today, then I just need to admit it to myself. I need to take stock of what influenced my decision not to do so that I can arm myself against making the same destructive decisions another day.
A lot of people find it very helpful to have a 3rd party be their accountability coach. Having a coach is awesome because it allows an outsider who is just looking in to give a more realistic assessment. A good coach has tools and technique to help you overcome obstacles that are standing in your way.
I have a coach. I am using one of their techniques to clear away false beliefs in my subconscious mind.
A coach must be direct, but kind. Sometimes our friends don’t want to hurt our feelings or would only be too glad to put us in our place.
If you are looking for someone to help you stay accountable, take advantage of a Free “Faith Explosion” Session where you will be able to:
- Identify what you really don’t want so you can know what you really want and
- Know how you can build the faith and action steps necessary to get what you want?
- Stay Accountable for the bite sized tasks that need to be done
There is no obligation and there are LIMITED spaces available – so hurry!
Click Here to schedule your Free “Faith Explosion” Session today!
You are in charge of your destiny!
It is time to take action today – not because the New Year is coming this week, but because you have made up your mind that you want change.
You are truly in charge of your destiny. You can have any future that you want – if you are willing to plan for it and work for it.
I believe in you.